QUARANTINE BLOG # 666

February 9, 2022

To borrow a phrase from one of my favorite movies, “I'm not a smart man,” at least when it comes to the world of high priced art.  But I know what an outrageous price is.  

Sotheby’s is having a modern and contemporary art sale on March 2 in London.  Let me start with two pieces that will not, as far as I know, be in the auction.

Your first task is to guess who painted each of these paintings.

Now, let’s not always see the same hands.

Give up?  Well, one of three major paintings to be offered includes a painting from Pablo Picasso called “Buste de Femme Accoudée” (Bust of a Woman Leaning) with a high estimate of $20 million.

And Pablo Picasso painted both “Science and Charity,” and “First Communion.”  He was 15!  What in the world happened to him after he grew up?

👉  For some time I have wanted to do a blog that was largely devoted to humor (as if $20 million of “Bust of a Woman Leaning” is not funny enough).  Thanks to contributions from several readers I have a good collection of smilies and other laughers.  So from a file marked “Philosophy” here is a dozen and a half offerings:

👉  Well after all of that philosophy, and since we haven’t been to the juke box in a long time, let’s relax with a great song from the 70s (and the story of the singer) before we close.

Jim Croce was killed in a small-plane crash in September 1973, the same week that a 45RPM single, the title cut from his studio album I Got a Name was released.  After the delayed release of a song from his previous album in late 1973, “I'll Have To Say I Love You In A Song” was chosen as the second single released from his final studio album.

Croce wrote the song in early 1973 when he arrived home and got into a disagreement with his wife, Ingrid.  Instead of arguing with her, she has stated that Croce “went downstairs, and he started to play like he always did when he wrote ... the next morning, he came up early in the morning and sang it to me.”

Ingrid Croce wrote an autobiographical cookbook, Thyme in a Bottle, in which she includes interesting anecdotes about Jim.  She wrote the following about “I’ll Have To Say ‘I Love You’ in a Song”:

One weekend, after being on the road for many months, Jim got a chance to come home to relax with his family.  We settled in to enjoy our time alone together.  Though Jim was expecting company the next day, avoiding confrontation he never told me that we were to be joined by an entire film crew!  The next morning, 15 people from Acorn Productions descended upon our house to record a promotional film of Jim Croce at Home on the Farm.  I prepared breakfast, lunch and dinner for the whole film crew and after the group left, I questioned Jim about our finances.  After a year and a half of his working so very hard on the road, we were barely making ends meet, but Jim wouldn’t talk about it.  He hated questions as much as he hated confrontation, especially about money.  He stormed out of our bedroom and went down to the kitchen table to brood.  The next morning he woke me gently by singing his new song. ‘Every time I tried to tell you the words just came out wrong.  So I’ll have to say “I love you” in a song.’

Listen to the song one more time, this time with a different video.

🛐  Today’s close, “An Unexpected Invitation,” is by Greg Laurie.

“As he walked along, he saw Levi son of Alphaeus sitting at his tax collector’s booth. ‘Follow me and be my disciple,’ Jesus said to him. So Levi got up and followed him” (Mark 2:14 New Living Translation).

Levi, who also was known as Matthew, collected taxes for Rome. Rome was the occupying force in Israel at the time, so people would have thought of Matthew as a traitor. 

Matthew would have been familiar with Jesus, because Jesus was ministering in the region where Matthew was. And being a tax collector, Matthew would have been aware of what was going on around him. We also know that he was a great student of the Scriptures because Old Testament prophecies fill the gospel that bears his name.

Ninety-nine Old Testament references in Matthew show how Jesus was the Messiah. So this was a man who knew the Word of God but chose to rebel against it. Yet there was something that Jesus said and did that softened Matthew’s hardened heart.

Why do people turn away from God in the first place? Why do people turn from the church?

These are interesting questions. I’ve heard people say they lost their faith because a tragedy happened, or they suffered the loss of a loved one, or they saw hypocrisy. But a faith that can’t be tested is a faith that can’t be trusted. That isn’t a real faith.

However, when Jesus said to Matthew, “Follow me and be my disciple” (Mark 2:14 NLT), Matthew stood up and followed Him. And in the next verse, the Bible tells us that Matthew “invited Jesus and his disciples to his home as dinner guests, along with many tax collectors and other disreputable sinners” (verse 15 NLT).

Notice that Jesus never said, “Follow My people.” Rather, He said, “Follow Me.” So put your eyes on Jesus Christ.

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QUARANTINE BLOG # 665

February 7, 2022

Yesterday at Crawfordville United Methodist Church I preached, “The Table of the Impossible.”  The text is Mark 6:30-56.

👉  A pastor asked a little boy if he said his prayers every night.  “Yes, sir.” the boy replied.  “And, do you always say them in the morning, too?” the pastor asked.  “No sir,” the boy replied. “I’m not scared in the daytime.” 

👉  Another section from our “Monday Pun” folder:

👉  In case you care, the NFC All-Pros lost 35-41 to the AFC All-Pros in this year’s football all star game laughingly called the “Pro Bowl.”  “Pro” being short for “professional” giving an image of star football players, doing their best to represent their conference and win a meaningless game.  If this play is any indication, we (and all I know about yesterday’s fiasco I learned researching for today’s blog)  missed absolutely nothing.  That humiliating sequence comes about because the players in the Pro Bowl came to a gentlemen’s agreement of sorts to have little or no tackling at all, trying to avoid contact at all as to avoid any unnecessary injuries.  And there were no kickoffs – they just spotted the ball.  As Charlie Brown said ...

👉  Our Monday morning sports report continues with a story of baseball card collecting gone insane.  In August, a T206 Honus Wagner baseball card set the stratospheric record for most expensive sports card of all time when it sold for $6,606,000.  This weekend, a sale was finalized for a T206 Honus Wagner card for $475,960, including a buyer’s premium.  A Wagner card sold for less than $1 million?  The catch? This Wagner card was torn in half. Wagner’s left jaw is missing, as is most of his torso.  PSA, the go-to card-grading company graded it “genuine” which means that the Wagner is “real but nothing more.”

👉  QB’s sports report ends with news that the lockout of Major League Baseball players is entering its third month (Yawn!) with no end in sight, the postponement of spring training looming, and the delaying of the regular season in the works.  At issue of course is money, money, money.  The owners offered federal mediation and the players said: 

The players are fighting any suggestion of a salary cap and salary floor (the only professional sports league without them).  The players want the competitive balance tax – a predetermined payroll threshold – raised from $210 million to $245 million; the league is offering $214 million.  The players want the minimum salary raised from $570,500 to $775,000; the league is offering a tiered minimum salary that starts at $615,000 and ends at $700,000.  All this while the annual salary of the President of the United States is $400,000!  

In published reports that will bring joy to baseball purists, there is progress in the negotiations, despite the preceding bad news: “The only real progress is that the league has agreed to a universal DH.”  Yippee!  (Read that with all the sarcasm you can muster mister).

👉  Let’s suppose that the millionaires who play the game and the millionaires who own the teams start playing nice-nice and the season opens on schedule, and that you want to go to the home opener of the World Champion Atlanta Braves (Yawn!) you will have to go to a resale site like StubHub (dugout corner seats are $303) because the game is sold out.  The first game you can sit closer to the field than the ones they sold to Bob Uecker is five games later – dugout corner seats are $108 each, so let’s go with that.  Family of 4: $432.  Parking is $30 for 3-4 hours at Truist Park.  Hot dogs are $6.50.  Soft drinks are $7.00 for a souvenir cup.  That’s $54 if that’s all you consume.  And all that to watch Freddie Freeman who earned $20,050,000 last year (his 8 year contract was $121,748,148).  

Freeman played an incredible 159 games last year – the average for MLB players is between 47 and 104.  So based on that, if the Braves sign Freeman this year, he will make $121,100.63 while you watch him play that game against the Washington Nationals.  And you spent $516 for the pleasure (assuming you don’t buy more food or souvenirs – if you make $25 an hour, that’s half a week’s pay).  Pittsburgh Pirates fans know that the payroll for the entire active major league team for 2022 is $95,000 more than Freddie Freeman will make – but then my poor pitiful punched-out Pirates haven’t played a world series game since 1979 and haven’t been close since 1992.

👉  Speaking of playing games, I enjoy Monopoly.  There are 8 different sets of Monopoly here at 233 and that doesn’t include, if memory serves, 2 Star Wars Monopoly sets which I gave to the players at Herrington Manor.  And Monopoly Longest Game Ever is in my Amazon shopping cart.  Just so you’ll know, this version has 66 properties, and not even bankruptcy will get you out of this game – the game continues until one player owns every property.  Oh yeah, there is only one die.  No more doubles.  For the record, there is a game in progress – the original version – on the dining room table to be concluded before supper tonight.  Now with that introduction, I give you the following picture from Instagram:

  Today’s close is from Praying with the Psalms, by Eugene H. Peterson.

“Good and upright is the Lord; therefore he instructs sinners in the way” (Psalm 25:8)

God likes our sins even less than our neighbors do.  But he treats them far differently.  Whereas other people reject and condemn us when we are flawed and recalcitrant, God mercifully and patiently “instructs,” “leads,” and “teaches” us.  Our sins are an occasion not for harsh rejection, but for loving reconciliation.

Prayer: I confess my sins to you, O Lord, confident that you will not reject this sinner, but find new ways to share your forgiveness and steadfast love, through the mediation of Jesus Christ, my Lord.  Amen.

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QUARANTINE BLOG # 664

February 6, 2022

Don’t Be the First One to Stop Clapping 

I first published this piece in The Augusta Chronicle April 1, 2000.

In 1971 Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn went into exile from his native Russia. Among other works, his The Gulag Archipelago 1918-1956: An Experiment in Literary Investigation earned him disgrace at home and high praise abroad. Americans at the highest levels sought out Solzhenitsyn and his counsel was gladly received. Then he began to talk about the things that were wrong with us and we stopped listening. The man once in demand became a virtual outcast in his New England home. He returned to Russia two decades after he left, this time a hero.

A few years ago I read The Gulag Archipelago in Samara, Russia. From 1939 until 1991 the 450 year-old city was known as Kuibyshev. Like so many other cities it was renamed for a “hero of the revolution,” or, in the case of some, just the survivors (I still remember my emotions when a Muscovite told me they now think Joseph Stalin was responsible for the deaths of 100,000,000 Russians. It is frightening to walk along the Kremlin wall today and see floral tributes piled on the murderer’s grave, dozens more flowers than on any other single grave).

Kuibyshev was a transit station on the way to Siberia – the worst of the prison camps. It was particularly moving to read of the arrests and deportations while living in a city which had seen the prison trains roll up to the outskirts of town, stop, and then be loaded with the condemned. No one ever announced that the trains were there, or indeed what they were for. Everyone simply knew.

One of Solzhenitsyn’s most chilling stories concerned a birthday party for Comrade Stalin, held in a small, out-of-the-way town. Stalin was, of course, no where in sight, but still there were speeches and applause. Without thinking, the mayor of the town rose and exhorted his fellows to one last cheer for the evening to the honor of Stalin.

The applause continued for minutes without stopping and everyone was growing weary, but who would dare to be the first to stop clapping? As the labored applause wore on an old man collapsed. Finally the mayor allowed his arms to drop and the noise died. The next evening the mayor was sentenced to the gulag, and no charges were ever spoken against him. As he stepped into the train, a party official whispered into his ear, “Never be the first one to stop clapping.”

Last Sunday night it was my pleasure to attend the regular worship service at Christ the Savior Baptist Church in Kishinev, Moldova. The two-hour service was standing room only, and in that part of the capitol, there was no heat. The faithful came regardless of the weather outside. Inside, the building was filled with the warmth of fellowship and the sense of the nearness of God.

For years, one of the highlights of my “far-flung trips to save the heathen,” as a letter writer to this paper once called them, has been the singing – in Russian and English – of “Our God is an Awesome God.” Now, add another song. I knew the tune as the choir began to sing in Romanian, but it took me a few seconds to pick up the words. I glanced across the audience at Sherrie Kincaid, a fellow traveler from Dallas, Texas, and smiled as it dawned on me. “Majesty,” the choir sang. “Worship his Majesty; unto Jesus be all glory, honor and praise. Majesty, kingdom authority, flows from his throne unto his own who his anthem raise. So exalt, lift up on high, the name of Jesus. Magnify, come glorify Christ Jesus the King.”

The preacher that night talked about addressing God with the words Jesus taught, not the “Our Father” prayer which we seem to recite as quickly and with as little feeling as we can, but his cry in Gethsemane, “Abba! Father!” In Romanian, it is Avva. In American, it is Daddy. Think of the confidence and love with which a child says that word. Think of the God who cares, who lavishes undeserved, prodigal love on those who are his own.

In a 1991 National Review article, Solzhenitsyn said: “The strength or weakness of a society depends more on the level of its spiritual life than on its level of industrialization. Neither a market economy nor even general abundance constitutes the crowning achievement of human life. If a nation’s spiritual energies have been exhausted, it will not be saved from collapse by the most perfect government structure or by any industrial development.”

Majesty. Worship his Majesty. And for love’s sake, never be the first one to stop clapping.

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QUARANTINE BLOG # 663

February 4, 2022

The Pacific Ocean encompasses one-third of the earth’s surface, covering twice the area of the Atlantic Ocean. It extends over a greater area than all the dry land on the planet, more than 63 million square miles. 

The men of the Armada de Molucca might as well have been sailing across the dark side of the moon.

On December 18, 1520, Magellan sailed west, away from South America into the Pacific. If there was ever a time for a monster to appear on the horizon, this was it. Instead, the Armada encountered a miracle: steady winds at its back.

Magellan expected to reach the Spice Islands within days, but Pigafetta chronicled: “We were three months and 20 days without getting any kind of fresh food. We ate ox hides that covered the top of the mainyard. We left them in the sea for five days, and then placed them on top of the embers, and ate them. We ate sawdust from boards. We ate rats when we could catch them.”

Deliverance finally came 98 days after the fleet left the strait. On March 6, 1521, two landmasses, and then a third, slowly rose from the sea; they appeared to be about 25 miles away. 

When the Victoria’s lookout was convinced of their true nature, he announced from on high, “Tierra! Tierra! Tierra!”

The Armada landed on Guam, the largest of an archipelago of volcanic islands known as the Marianas, about 3000 miles west of the Hawaiian Islands.

Nothing about it suggested they were anywhere near the Spice Islands. Still, it was land. Since leaving the western mouth of the strait, Magellan had traveled more than 7000 miles without interruption: the longest ocean voyage recorded at that time.

Magellan’s fleet was approached by a tribe now known as the Chamorros. They boarded the flagship and stole everything they could – rigging, crockery, weapons, and anything made of iron – as the crew, in their weakened condition, were unable to stop them.

After an initial outbreak of distrust, the Chamorros distributed food to the starving sailors, and returned most of the stolen goods. The fleet was loaded fruit and vegetables. 

On March 16, a lookout spied the eastern edge of the Philippine archipelago. A boat with nine men appeared, and the two groups traded freely. Magellan invited the Filipinos aboard Trinidad. The Filipinos recognized the spices on board. It was the first indication that the Armada was approaching the Spice Islands.

Magellan’s slave, Enrique, addressed the locals in a Malay dialect, who replied in the same tongue. Magellan had acquired Enrique ten years earlier in Malacca. If Enrique had originally come from these islands, it meant that Magellan’s servant was, in fact, the first person to circle the world and return home.

On the island of Cebu, for a time, life seemed tranquil, and the men, enjoying their nights with their island lovers, were reluctant to leave.

Unexplainably, Magellan involved himself in a struggle between two local chieftains, Lapu Lapu and Sula. Magellan sided with Sula, and sent his forces into battle.

For the first time since their arrival in these lush islands, Magellan’s inner circle seriously questioned Magellan’s judgment. But Magellan refused to back down.

He reduced the number of men going ashore to a bare minimum, and he ordered his ships to keep far back. These crucial strategic decisions would be disastrous.

Magellan gave the order to prepare for attack, and his force of 60 men donned armor. He ordered his Cebuans allies not to fight, but merely to observe the “Spanish lions” hunt their prey.

The Mactanese emerging from the jungle numbered not in the dozens as expected, but 1500.

After fierce fighting for more than an hour, Magellan was shot in the leg with a poisoned arrow, and finally gave the order to retreat. With superior numbers Lapu Lapu pressed the attack until Magellan lay dead on he sand, pierced with many spears and ultimately hacked to pieces. 

The circumstances leading to Magellan’s gory death were not an aberration. Rather, it was the direct outcome of his belligerent conduct in the Philippines. Through military displays, Magellan convinced the islanders – and himself – that he was omnipotent. Throughout the voyage, Magellan had overcame storms and scurvy, and mutinies. In the end, the only peril he could not survive was himself.

After the battle ended, the fleet sent a message to Lapu Lapu, requesting the remains of Magellan and the other victims.  They offered to pay as much as the victors wanted in exchange for the fallen soldiers.

Lapu Lapu’s replied: “You cannot have him for all the riches in the world. We will keep him as a memorial.”

The most impressive sight in Mactan harbor today is a giant statue of Lapu Lapu, his bamboo spear at the ready, as he gazes over the Pacific. There is no other record of Lapu Lapu or his reign; were it not for his battle with Magellan, his name would be lost to history.

A white obelisk presents the European point of view: “Here on 27th April 1521 the great Portuguese navigator Hernando de Magallanes, in the service of the King of Spain, was slain by native Filipinos.”

Every April, Filipinos restage the battle of Mactan. Thousands turn out to witness the re-enactment between the nearly naked Filipino warrior and the armor-clad invader who eventually falls face down into the surf.

Next week the conclusion.

🛐  Today’s close “God’s Thoughts,” is by Max Lucado.

We ask for grace, only to find forgiveness already offered. (How did you know I would sin?)

We ask for food, only to find provision already made. (How did you know I would be hungry?)

We ask for guidance, only to find answers in God’s ancient story. (How did you know what I would ask?)

God dwells in a different realm. God’s thoughts are not our thoughts, nor are they even like ours. We aren’t even in the same neighborhood. 

We’re thinking, Preserve the body, he’s thinking, Save the soul. We dream of a pay raise. He dreams of raising the dead. We avoid pain and seek peace. God uses pain to bring peace. “I’m going to live before I die,” we resolve. “Die, so you can live,” he instructs. 

We love what rusts. He loves what endures. We rejoice at our successes. He rejoices at our confessions. We show our children the Nike star with the million-dollar smile and say, “Be like Mike.” God points to the crucified carpenter with bloody lips and a torn side and says, “Be like Christ.”

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QUARANTINE BLOG # 662

February 2, 2022

Because Monday’s blog, QB 661, was the “This Month in History” feature, the sermon from the Crawfordville Pulpit has been delayed until today.  Here is “Self-Sufficient?” from Jonah 1:1-2, 3:10-4:3, 10-11, Ephesians 6:10-20; John 11:45-48, 53.

👎  This just in: at 07:25 this morning at Gobbler’s Knob, PA, Punksutawney Phil made his 136th annual prediction – as seen in the accompanying photo, there will be six more weeks of winter.  QB, as of this posting, was unable to locate General Beauregard Lee or Gary the Groundhog in Kleinburg, Ontario, Canada.  However, from Nova Scotia, Shubenacadie Sam agrees with Phil.

👉  Several issues ago QB looked at an incredible house in the Caribbean.  Today, one that is closer to home – an estate with two main houses.  Located in Miami’s Coconut Grove, and perched above a coral reef, the estate went on the market for $150 million.  That price gets you houses with 25,000-square-feet, more than 4 acres and 400 feet of frontage on the Biscayne Bay.  Villa Serena (to the left) was once owned by three-time presidential candidate and onetime U.S. Secretary of State William Jennings Bryan.  Peggy Hopkins Joyce, a Ziegfeld Follies girl, owned the land where the other house, Indian Spring was built.  If you like living beside of celebrities, Madonna lives next door, but she is seldom home.  Philanthropist Adrienne Arsht whose estate this is has said she will donate the proceeds of the sale to charitable causes.

👉  A pair of Blackouts for your Wednesday morning:

👉  A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, “So your mother says your prayers for you each night?  That’s very commendable.  What does she say?”  The little boy replied, “Thank God he’s in bed!” 

👉  Two from “Ooh You’re Gold”:

👉  Sandy Sanderson, who lives in Hamilton, New Zealand, has been creating vehicles from aluminum cans for more than 15 years.  

Using his skill and following a motorbike accident that shattered his left wrist, Sandy had to step away from designing and building electric stringed instruments and instead turned his attentions to creating automotive masterpieces out of aluminum, a material that’s easier to shape and one that does not require the use of heavy power tools.

The Waikato Buggy took 30 cans to build.

The CanCars are available for purchase or, for the adventurous, plans – from his website– are available to build your own version of Sandy’s CanCars.  Thanks to Brian for this story. 

That's Sandy, not Brian 😄

👉  Of Leonardo da Vinci’s works, the Mona Lisa is the only portrait whose authenticity has never been seriously questioned.  He had begun working on a portrait of Lisa del Giocondo, the model of the Mona Lisa, by October 1503.  The Louvre states that it was “doubtless painted between 1503 and 1506,” but some art historians put it post-1513.  In 1516, Leonardo was invited by King Francis I to work for his majesty, and it is believed that he took the Mona Lisa with him and continued to work on it after he moved to France.  It was acquired by King Francis and is now the property of the French Republic, on permanent display at the Louvre, Paris since 1797.

On August 21, 1911, the painting was stolen from the Louvre.  French poet Guillaume Apollinaire came under suspicion and was arrested and imprisoned.  Apollinaire implicated his friend Pablo Picasso, who was brought in for questioning.  Both were later exonerated.  The real culprit was Louvre employee Vincenzo Peruggia, who had helped construct the painting’s glass case.  He carried out the theft by entering the building during regular hours, hiding in a broom closet, and walking out with the painting hidden under his coat after the museum had closed.  Peruggia was an Italian patriot who believed that Leonardo’s painting should have been returned to an Italian museum.  

The Mona Lisa is one of the most valuable paintings in the world. It holds the Guinness World Record for the highest known painting insurance valuation in history at US $100 million in 1962 (equivalent to $870 million in 2021).  The painting, unframed, measures 30 x 21 inches.

Leonardo’s portrait is also the inspiration for the classic song “Mona Lisa” by American lyricist Ray Evans and songwriter Jay Harold Livingston.  It was recorded in 1950 by jazz pianist and vocalist Nat King Cole.

👉  Something to think about:

👉  Something else to think about:

👉  Book Toons:

🛐  Today’s close is from Praying with the Psalms, by Eugene H. Peterson.

“Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth, and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all day long” (Psalm 25:4-5).

Trial and error is a poor strategy for learning how to live. The way of faith is illuminated with precedents and examples (“your ways, O Lord”) that can save us both the embarrassment of being foolish and the pain of making mistakes.

Prayer: O God, even as Abraham “set out, not knowing where he was going” and arrived at the land of promise by your guidance, so I would make my way believing in your promises and guided by your commandments, looking to Jesus, the “pioneer and perfecter” of my faith (Hebrews 11:8, 12:2). Amen.

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